Sunday 29 April 2012

Post-it ノート: Waffle on the go :)

haiz, i has no brains...
just a waffled chip bit of my brain, which has totalliee no sense. 
we discussed (No ABOUT) poems on life and i wanted to go on and on and on and on forever and fangirl over its awesomeness, but people were getting distracted and such that it was weird if i were to continue to fawn over it in a corner. instead, i left my thoughts to myself.
i wish i could write such awesome poems. i wish, i wish, i wish.
___

life is a ticking, restless clockwork--
a kaleidoscope of hopes that fade into
warped images, they quirk 
into an alley, flying through.

 Past the memories that flicker
and twist into an oblivion of scattered
fireflies that smugly snicker
with knowledge of truths torn and tattered.

Against the merry-go-round
of thick, creamy webs of lies
that bond masks who astound 
the faded tattoo of love, beating symphonies of cries.

life is a waffle
of bits and pieces.
a puzzle to baffle,
of cracks and creases.
___

I tried to make it rhyme, I did! and the hardest part was to make it make sense.

Waffle on the go. 
Have a bite of dough.

SEEEE? it doesn't rhyme nor does it make sense, it never does ; - ; oh well,
cos i has no brains.
: D
tralalalalalalalalalalala

Ollieeeeeee :)

Saturday 28 April 2012

Penguins Attention! :)


Kimberally-- our Class Mascot :D:D:D It's so cuteeeee


This is the penguin I made, WITHOUT HANDS ^o^ And the carrot :D It looks pretty stupid, actually. But still, I'm naming it...
... 
...
The CARROT one :D

ZOMG :D PENGUINS ATTENTION, PENGUINS BEGIN~~~~~~! ;D

Monday 23 April 2012

Acrophobia--Fear of Heights and a little waffle

An unbidden image arose in her mind.

A monochromatic world, the tiny dots that stained the canvas of her thoughts. They were so miniature, so small. She felt too big, looking down upon all of them. The ledge was reshaping, closing in into a compact area. So painfully tight, so painfully worrying. There was just a fleck of dust to stand on, but her weight was going to make it crack. She was going to fall. The mist clouded over her mind, tracing and retracing a single word that haunted her peace.

She felt her finger slide desperately, gliding across the air, cutting into the breeze swirling around her. Her fingers fumbled over the specks of dust that lolled around, drifting gleefully around the air, thick and lazy. Slender and pale, they opened and closed, as though trying to catch what little ray of glittering sunlight there was in her hands.There was nothing to hold on to, nothing, nothing.

Nothing.


She gasped, the contraction of her lungs, as though a hand had cupped over her throat and wrung the life out of her. It was hard to breathe, so hurtfully hard to breathe. It was impossible to suck in just one small gulp of air-- her muscles were losing control. Paralysed, in mid-air. Her heart thumped, palpitated, and threw itself countless times over the thick walls that was keeping it from escape.

escape-- what a sweet word.


Just one step back, back onto solid, firm ground. If only she could lift up the stumps of her legs, if only she could leap... The muscles in her fingers flexed. As she squinted over her shoulder, it was to her horror and its cheer that the ground was so far away. The gravel was inching away, increasing the distance between them.

There was an invisible feather upon her legs-- tickling them mercilessly with a mocking laugh. She was floating, held up by stronger forces, the wind whipping against her face. Their hands brushed past her bangs, pulling them back gently but firmly. They slid their cool fingers up and down her arms, gleefully asking,

"Can you see now? Can you?"

She shook her head, but all she could manage was a tilting of her head to the left, then right. There was nothing to see, even as her fear's hands peeled her eyes open and purred for her to see the world laid out beneath her. Her shoes, red and pointed, were huge. And she felt as though she was stomping on all those little atoms, splintered into single blocks of life, exploding and then reforming, the cycle of life repeating. She shifted her weight to the other foot, but then paused. What if she were to roll off and fall?

"I don't want to fall," she whispered in a muted prayer. "Don't, don't, don't let me fall. Someone. Someone."

Musing-- God of Death

Have you ever thought so much about Death that you got addicted to it?

I have--I am.

It just seems so peculiar as to where we're going after Death, and I can only picture black, darkness and numbness. If Death is such a place, perhaps I want to go there. Still, it's only what we can imagine. But the thought of a place simply being an absence of everything is rather scary.

And it sounds rather tempting. Rather simple, as compared to the restless clockwork of life.

... And it's so simple that it terrifies me. How can one thing be so simple,so straightforward? I don't dare to open my arms and fling myself towards it. It is a lack of faith. An overdose of suspicion, cautiousness.

... Oh bananas. I sound so suicidal and creepy. Let's talk about fluffy ponies and nyan-cats that poop rainbows.

...
oh, bananas. =3=

Montage is due, due, due.
... I forgot what date it was.
Let's write a poem for Meggi :D

Sunday 22 April 2012

sifted through all of my blog posts and realised that most of the writings there are crapcrapcrap.
=3= bleh. i feel so ashamed. *hides in corner*

but hopefully, hopefully, i have made some progress from those fluffy fluffy fluffy crap :D




because... beauty is in the eye of the beholder. 
i'm wondering whether to upload the draft copy of 'iridescent' that i wrote for school =3=

Saturday 21 April 2012

Post-it ノート: aaarrrggghhhhh

aargh.

I should be starting on my list of fear thingy thingy thingy.

Indeed, I have already started, but I have no idea how to conclude it at all. Perhaps I should try to stand on the top of a building? (acrophobia, blobbins, my dears)

I'm listening to Twinkle X Twinkle by Miku and Luka :D
Was listening to I = Fantasy, sung by Len and SeeU. But then again, SeeU is a Korean Vocaloid, so does that mean that I'm listening to K-pop? ... Hm, maybe. Ah well, music is all around the soul and world so let's not care. And the lyrics are rather meaningful. Maybe I've opened my J-popiness to K-pop as well, but only for the branch of Vocaloid?

Interesting.

I am a dream
You are a dream
I am a fantasy,
fantasy, fantasy, fantasyyyyyy.

... Uhh...
Anyways, I tried drawing her on my handy dandy notebook (sounds familiar, eh?) and it was disastrous =3= For one, I can't get the body posture right, nor the facial expression or the hair. FAIL.
Teto's awesome at singing I = Fantasy. There was this really clean version of I=Fantasy by Teto and I loved it :D Aargh. Get back to my writing.

And I was avoiding Fanfiction.net for some reason. I think I'm more of a Fictionpress person instead of a FF person =.= And I'm looking back at my writings and I feel like they're all crap, crap, crap and I just want to scrap it all but I would be tortured by the fanvirus later.

Aarrgh, Helium, just create a random post and paste it on your bloggg, I'm dying of simply waiting. And I'm avoiding Jerry's posts because my stomach hurts too much from laughing. =3=

hm, maybe I should create a post on seniors in particular. /gets shot/ but it's dangerous here >.>... <.< |||

Friday 20 April 2012

Post-it ノート: short notes

i have a passion for short posts.
to tell the truth, i have no idea why my friends (except you, jerry :D) love to write short stories on their blogs and refuse to post unless their short stories are completed.

a blog isn't solely for posting works or creations... is it?

and that's why i love visiting jerry's blog. it's random, and it has character.


it shows her personality and it's always breaking through a fourth wall, that's why i love it so much.
don't get jealous, dear friends, just a sudden thought.

listening to: Twinkle Twinkle by Hatsune Miku and Megurine Luka :)

Musings-- we'll keep it there

Supposedly the world is crashing upon you,
and there's no one there left to help you.

One hand strikes out, but there's no point in anything at all.
Do you get tired of getting tired of life?

When there's so much to see, but you're content with your mind's eye flipping through the scrapbook of your worn-out, torn and tattered memories.

This blog is a dangerous place:
Spinning in progress-- the disastrous web of a scarlet, luscious liquid that trickles down hesitantly upon the sides of your throat, clutching at the hesitation stuck in your vocal box.

All I see are screen shots. Profile images, silhouette of people-- past people who waltzed in and out of my life. And some more happy faces, the ones I can never ever understand, the delicate smile that pierces through each layer of mask with despair. But oh, such beauty as well.

Names piece together letter by letter, stringing helplessly along a fragmented rainbow, splintered into a million mirrors.

Kamikorosu , I'll bite you to death. 

Thursday 19 April 2012

Fear of the month (April)


A
Acrophobia--fear of heights
Ablutophobia-- fear of bathing, washing or cleaning
Anthropophobia --type of social fear (fear of people)

All these were chosen through a fruit machine :D

Let's start writing~ :D

Even tho I say it's "Of the Month", it may be irregular :D
tralalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala

Wednesday 18 April 2012

Post-it ノート: Mental note-to-self (1)

1. When there is a sale of cookies, never hesitate to buy more than one pack of cookies.

2. Never attempt to keep your teacher in class by screaming your head off.

3. When in doubt, munch on cookies.

4. Never hide behind a dustbin when a senior is near.

5. If you are VERY OBVIOUSLY going to walk in a direction, don't change direction half-way even when a senior is walking past you. This may result in severe head injury of hitting the wall and may even result in more attention focused on you.

6. Haemoglobin is not to be pronounced as HaemoBBLOBin. No matter how strong the urge/temptation.

7. Writing a letter to yourself in the future (100 days later) is no easy feat.

8. Munching on fish-shaped cookies are nice, although it gets rather awkward when you're within radius of a senior and going "nomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnom"

9. Doing something completely random with your class at 1.12pm was awesome.


The end~
One last edit, to Jerry: I hate sotongs. They disgust me. And the name 'Ollie' does not sound like octopus. :P

Monday 16 April 2012

Post-it ノート: Lol you, Jerry

I was back from reading Jerry's blog, trying to figure out the mysterious url. And then I saw the one that I was looking for...

a frenzy of bananas.
T3T
佩服,佩服!

She made me laugh like mad, as if I wasn't.
YOU AWESOME BANANA : D
*randomly doodles a banana and pastes it on Jerry's head.*

Ollie

Saturday 14 April 2012

Alice Apocalypse, Chapter 2

There is not much doubt in the stillness of the night. She gazes out over the horizon, in her hand a mug. Jagged lines run down the porcelain cup, staining its pure whiteness with stripes of black. Her hand hovers above the cup, and she stares up at the stars.

It is warm and deeply scented with the thick fragrance of coffee. She sniffs at her palm, amused at her own actions. Under the deep cloak of the sky-- ragged and bitter with blackness-- she feels comfort. It is probably unheard of to be out of home, even though it was her home-- the wilderness outside of the barriers of thick, cold walls, in the darkness. This is the time for the members of the triads, a secret meeting amongst the smoky haze. Deep grunts and irritated growls.

"Alice," he breathes.

She groans. Mike, again. He was pestering her over her meeting with Brian, once more. That thick-skull moron, she pauses in her thoughts, wondering who she was exactly scolding. Both, she decides. Mike shuffles over to where she sits, his palm falling over hers. Rolling her eyes, she slaps it away. He settles down into the nest of grass and stares at her. His onyx hair falling into his eyes and his thumb resting on his lower lip.

"What now, Mike?" she demands.

"The papers, you left them--"

"I have no need for such junk."

"Then why the hassle to retrieve it from Brian?"

She laughs shakily, gingerly placing the mug on the grass. The brown liquid sloshes about in its own hypnotising pattern and she gazes at it dazedly. He pokes her arm, and she shudders at the warmth of his hand.

"I assumed you should have known by now."

"Tell me," he questions, leaning in.

"There is no need to tell you."

"Hm," he draws back, staring at the stars.

There is a brief silence as she glances at his profile, surprised at the sudden disappearance of curiosity. She raises an eyebrow suspiciously and scowls. There is no doubt that his very presence --although it had meant to be one to comfort-- was disturbing her. To each her own, there was not much trust-- most of the people who joined the 'black' society had their trusts worn out and splintered into fragments-- if there was even trust left to be placed into the unpredictable hands of people.

She is back in Nox, away from the peacefulness of Eden. In Nox, most of the hours are dedicated to the darkness, to the dreams of the night. Eden was crippling, the bright sunlight that caressed her face, blowing lightly at the strands of chocolate hair that masked half of her face. She tried to draw up her hood, but the people there didn't seem to mind, so she showed her face and arms, proudly embossed with the Nox mark.

"Tell me about Eden," Mike pips up.

"What?"

"Eden, you heard me."

"Who would ever want to know about that place?"

"I do."

"We're in Nox, dude." She sighs at Mike's antics.

"Just because we're in Nox doesn't mean that we can't dream."

"We all dream--"

"Dream in colours?" he interrupts.

"Monochromatic world, this one is. We're in Nox. It's a secret rule never to yearn to be back in that place. We're different, better not to know about Eden," she shakes her head, reaching out for the mug once more.

"I was curious, I don't yearn for things. I am incapable of feeling strong emotions, you know that."

"Fine, it's a place where Nyan-Cats poop rainbows and fluffy ponies fly all over the palace of wonders, hear that?"

"You're speaking like them, now," he complains, ruffling her hair.

"Dude, you didn't have to ruffle my hair. It's true that there are Nyan-Cats that poop rainbows and dudes that sing in chipmunk-like sopranos."

"No, not like the others. You speak difficult terms of the people in Eden."

"I do not," she spits.

"We were from there, once. I don't see what's wrong in speaking like them," he draws circles on the grass.

"It's wrong, it just is."

With that final statement, she stands up with the mug in hand and stomps away. Mike glances dazedly at her retreating figure. She sighs, swallowing back that tiny amount of hesitation. Right now, she would have rather been from Aora, even Kingslain than Eden. Anywhere but that. And she would rather Mike be smarter, instead of being ignorant to spew out logical statements that made her head hurt. If only his brain was a bit more warped and dark.

Then again, she wished that everyone's mind was less complex and simpler. That was the only way she could return to Eden-- an impossible dream of vivid colours.
_______________________________________________________________________________

I has no idea what I has written.

You can see that my brain have deteriorated to the point where I has no grammar at all.

... Alice is squishy and cute.
Jerry, don't tell her that, even tho I repeat it to her every single day.
Lol.

Ollie : D

Tuesday 10 April 2012

Musings --absence of oxygen

And the absence of oxygen is nothing more than a muted silence, falling into an abyss of darkness where flickering fireflies dance about.

The mere breath that shoots across the onyx backdrop of wishes, landing as sparks that struggle to return to the adventure of thrill and wonder.

Sinking is but a desire to fallfallfall and never resurface to face the merry-go-round of life.

Friday 6 April 2012

Alice Apocalypse, Chapter 1

"You used to be here, didn't you?"

There is a pregnant pause.

"Sorta, I guess," she murmurs, stubbing her cigarette on the table

Her fingers scrape through the bunch of drawings kept in the file. Many are dog-eared, withering. On the surface, they are nothing but bleak, dull and random doodles that would never make any sense at all. They are armed with battle scars, who stand tall and proud of the evidence of their bravery. The lines are crooked, winding and long. The papers droop into a low, respectful bow. 

Her slender fingers slide against the rough material of the paper. She sniggers and it soon escalates into a maniacal laughter. He glances at her, taking a casual swig of the beer. The scribbles are still there, faded over time. Yet they sparkle, gleaming in the dim light. 

Don't you remember? Don't you? They ask softly. 

She nods her head seriously, her fingertips tracing the lines. Jagged, uneven and forceful. A sudden spark of indignant, anger and yet bitter regret. A corner of her lips creeps upward, as she flips through the papers almost nonchalantly. She slams the file on the table and leans across it, tilting her head to the side. The cigarette has fallen to the ground, yet it still burns on passionately. Sparks flicker in and out of existence, struggling to survive-- and impossible task. The smoke drifts and floats up in the air, slithering away from the two wretched souls. It hisses in amusement as it watches the exchange between the two doomed souls, one who is trying to redeem what is left of her splintered life, wash away the blackness that has eaten away her soul; the other in defeat, condemned to his own fate already. It smirks and wafts away into another adventure, a new life...

"So?" he asks lowly.

"I... am pleasantly surprised. Name it," she demands hoarsely, combing through her dyed hair.

"I am hurt, that you think so much of me," he leans back into the shadows, but she can still hear the mocking tone-- it is too familiar.

"I see, farewell, we will never have to meet again," she taunts, grabbing the file before standing up.

She takes a step out of her seat and turns.

He makes no movement.

Her steps are deliberate, as she waits for the next sentence to be uttered with malice. The audience is waiting, as she is too-- with an impatient mind. The lines are to be said-- it is the way of the triads, a rule. Her next faltering step is the cue, yet he takes no notice.

Silence still rules. It is too loud.

Where are the shouts? The affronted bangs on the table?


She spins around, angered. What is he doing? He sits at the table, his beady eyes narrowed. His lips curl up into a sneer, a smug look plastered on his face. Her anger amplifies. How dare he toy around with her? She growls, although the temporary disfigurement of her face does not mar her beauty.

"You expected an idiot," he fingers his chin. "Now you lose."

"We'll see."
_________________________________________________________________________________

Ollie : I'm so glad that Alice doesn't have an access to my blog. :D:D:D
... Well, I wanted to reserve the title 'Alice in Wonderland' for another play, but this just fit perfectly. Yesh, I am obsessed with 'Alice in Wonderland' for the moment...

Edit: it is now called 'Alice Apocalypse'. :D


Ollie

Wednesday 4 April 2012

Musings --4 April 2012

you have to learn what is right, and what is wrong.

it is the sudden nostalgic feeling of warmth, huddling in my parents' room, on the mattress on the floor. The light is dimmed, compared to the everyday life wherein it's just too bright and you can see everything clearly. too clearly. My bare feet rubs against the rather furry bedsheet and tries to derive some warmth from the action, although my senses are tinkling at the cooling breeze. my hair is still wet, dripping--rather, and the pillows are stacked under my body, clustered around me. it feels like the past, when we were all so young and carefree. i sigh, and a Hatsune Miku song is playing in the background. from y to y. a soothing melody that erases my flaws and errors and i am lost in it, a hypnotic trance-like state. i groan inwardly upon thinking of the busy schedule tomorrow and it's too clustered. my word document is still open, the flashing tab pleading me to just type something, anything in.



i grin at how it is simply impossible for me to bear a grudge against someone for long. it is the characteristic of a karakuri pierrot. there is no need for me to wear a mask anymore, for it has already been stuck firmly to the contours of my face. a smile that used to be unnatural has already been so frequently flashed that it does not matter what the emotions are inside.

i am an imperfection, one that was born a defect and forever like that. i glance at my seniors and somehow, i am reminded that they are going to leave anyway. people will come and go, and i will too. there was a sudden train of thought that erupted in my mind in the afternoon, on the train.

i hate this place. after six years of misery and forever being alone, i'm still stuck to this clumsy and irritating shell, it hates me. i hate it too but we can only depend upon each other to survive. i thought it would be a change but in the end it doesn't matter because i'm just going to live through another four years. and then two, probably five later before dying away. 


it never does really matter. sometimes i wonder about my own existence. what am i? why am i here? am i just another puppet? is this a parody of me?

a quote from Finding Nemo, that I still blurt out at times,

"Curse you aqua-scum!"

Awepic.

sigh. i know i shouldn't be feeling stress-- what is this year anyway? isn't supposed to be the most slack year? where should i be getting the stress from anyway? it's undeserved and if i'm going to point break at this point, i'm just useless. i shouldn't be having stress. i don't deserve to claim that i'm stressed, because i'm not supposed to have.

i need hersheys.
alice is so cute :D
and she likes hersheys too. :D

Sunday 1 April 2012

Teto :D

I just remembered.
Happy Birthday, Teto :D

WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY~
Here's a french bread. XD

The Train

The Train is always rushing,
Upon the weather-beaten tracks.
It leads to nowhere,
that legend I have heard many times.
Of freedom and a world of iridescence. 
It travels loudly and lazily, the constant shaking of the train.
I say it runs in a loop, 
A loop of consciousness that drifts through the air.
It fades over a sketch, on the canvas
that is ensnared by the charcoal that slashes
pain of its withering ashes.
It reveals nothing but a cage, 
metal and brittle.
The ribbons of memories sidle up the bars like snakes,
poised elegantly and dangerously. 
They melt into the metal,
seeping through the unfeeling barriers of the inanimate object. 
Threads of emotions bind together in a fluid movement,
a scene is painted out, sepia and bleak
of memories that flow away and evaporate into thin air
dusting away the atoms that burst and reform.
Film frames are discarded and the images
blend into a mixture, a compound of black.
The Train leads to nowhere, they say.
Because it is the rebirth of the passengers
innocent and renew.
They alight as hollow shells
waiting to be filled up
until they board The Train again.